How is it possible to be back on after a hard fall? How is it possible to get over the pain and sadness so quickly? How is it possible to learn quickly from previous experience and build a new strategy?

These questions resemble the Japanese proverb, “Fall seven times, stand up eight.”

But how do you do it?

One way is to start by acknowledging that experiences are not good or bad. Only the way you perceive them gives meaning. In this direction, how do you make your own decisions and know what is good or bad?

How much do you understand about what happens in your mind? How much from the emotional and how much from the logical side take part in that decision? How much do you know about what is important to you?

How much do you know about your values?

Do you know that all our decisions are based on a value system?

Imagine that you have a dilemma, or some situations are nagging at you, and you can’t find an answer. After identifying and being aware of your value system, you will delete the word regrets from your vocabulary.

You will make certain decisions much more quickly and won’t let harmful situations repeat. You will eliminate guilt and be happy with your choices, even if some are hard.

If you want to understand the logic behind the decision-making process, here is a method to understand your value system.

Take your time and be patient because the process is a bit longer if you want to do it correctly and have results. From experience, I needed four hours the first time I did it.

Step 1. Identify your values and formulate them in affirmative and positive terms.

If you do not know your values, ask yourself:

What is important to me? What needs to happen to know that I respect this value?

Also, you will have many suggestions by searching Google the word “values.” Pick the important ones for you(health, friendship, family, love, growth, education, career, religion, spirituality, freedom, etc.)

Step 2. Clearly define these values by answering this question: 

What needs to happen to know that I respect this value?

It is essential to use many details in this section because each person defines these values very differently.

For some, communication is texting on Whatsapp; for others is talking on the phone, and others think of communication only when they have face-to-face conversations.

Step 3. You have to order these values to make your hierarchy.

You do that by asking these questions:

Is value X more important than value Y?

What would it be like if I had a life without value X(for example, health), without value Y(family)?

Which is more important for you goes up, and which is less important goes down. This comparison should be made for the whole list, for all values combined.

Step 4. Set the non-negotiable limit

Go through the list of values from bottom to top and ask:

Would I be satisfied with myself if I didn’t have the value X?

If the answer is YES, you have a negotiable value and go up. You go up the list until you find a non-negotiable value, where the answer is, “NO if I don’t respect that, it’s serious.”

Whenever you have a decision to make, you put the list in front of you and ask yourself:

If I make this decision, what values are respected, and which ones are violated?

Now you know the process I did the first time when I climbed the Matterhorn and decided to return, only with 100 meters left. Given the weather conditions with extreme wind, was staying alive or touching the peak more important? Well, you already know the answer.

After understanding and using such methods, life changes for the better. It is like learning to switch gears in the car. You will no longer be stuck in second gear and be frustrated by going 20.

After learning such powerful NLP methods, why not drive and live200 every single time?