How to focus – the 5 enemies that ruin your concentration and how to get back on your track!
You all know the saying: “If you don’t work on your dream, you will work on someone else’s.”
I remember hearing this one many years ago but didn’t know exactly what it meant. Why? Because I didn’t have any dreams of my own at the time.
Back then, I didn’t do anything in such a way to feel that sensation of fulfillment known by many as being in the flow, where you live 100% in the present moment and time no longer exists.
Due to personal development and my knowledge of neurolinguistic programming, I started working on myself and found not one but several activities that would give me that state of continuous focus, happiness, and fulfillment. In the end, I learned how to focus.
After using some NLP methods to transform my dreams into goals, a new challenge appeared: staying focused. I noticed some habits in my daily routines that were entirely unproductive and identified five distractions that can divert you from your planned destination.
Pleasure: social media, television, endless meetings, discussions, gossip. Do you know how much time an average person spends on social media or how much screen time he has in one day? Let me tell you: 5,22 hours in Germany and 7 hours in the USA. (The source you can find it here) In the end, do you really need it?
Accomplishments: the desire to always win, have exposure, and always be “on the news.” This desire makes you not live in the present moment. How to focus when you concentrate on the outside, on the future, or on the opinion of others? Please understand that the ability to concentrate is internal. If you always are focused on doing it, you’ll miss the being.
Belonging or the feeling of membership: the desire to belong to specific communities. The sense of belonging is normal, and it is saved in our deeper brain structures.
Let me ask you:
“Who depends most of the time on others?”
“A child.”
Until we grow up and evolve not only physically but also emotionally, this feeling of membership will control our lives. We will always say yes to others, even when we don’t want it.
Entertainment and fun: parties, events, and celebrations.
Friday night a party, Saturday again, Sunday maybe a brunch or a late dinner. If you do it frequently, you will mess up your sleep habits and weaken your body. How to focus when you do not have the right amount of sleep or energy? Is it possible? No! 100% No!
To focus, we need a superior function in our brain, which requires a lot of energy. Please understand that if you make partying a lifestyle, the body will eventually say no.
Appearance: everything from the outside that society puts such a high price on: clothes, accessories, cars, and vacations.
Do you really need another pair of shoes, a new dress, or a new watch? If you keep it minimal, you will eventually notice how few things you actually need.
Let me tell you a short story: it is said that Socrates was going with his pupils, and at some point, in front of a market, Socrates stopped and started to laugh. Everybody stopped and asked the great philosopher. “Why do you laugh? What is so funny?”
The answer came like lightning: “Look at all the products on the market. I laughed because now I understand how many things I do not need.”
In my coaching sessions, I use the following questions to help my clients understand their behaviors better.
- How does my current action help me with my goal?
- How does the thing I want to buy, support me to become better?
- How long would it take me to reach my objective if I continued doing what I am now?
The answers come naturally, and the clients understand whether their actions support their dreams and development.
You see … you can not control what you don’t know, and you can not know until you start exploring. That is the purpose of coaching. To make you think and provide new options.
What do you think about the five types of distractions I discovered? Are they real or not? What do you think is your major distraction right now? How do you feel right now when you know more about how to focus?
Feel free to write me a message and share your experience!
If you still want a specialist opinion to get a new perspective in Coaching, please write to me privately. Additionally, if you want to read about my other project where you become one with the mountains, you can do it here!
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